Shut Up When I'm Talking

Jaw surgery update and semi-political ramblings

Sat, 12 Dec 2009 20:52:36 GMT

First off, many thanks to everyone who has donated money to help me get my jaw fixed. I was able to get braces earlier this year with $5k leftover to put toward the surgery, which is estimated to cost $15k.

I know I haven't been very active in comics or on livejournal lately. That's because I've been spending all my free time freelancing to earn money to put toward surgery. I don't really have much of a life outside my work right now. I do miss making comics. I miss my readers and the community. But I have to do this. Surgery has to happen in February/March.

The following is exactly why I had to quit comics: Young and Uninsured: Cartoonist Julia Wertz

My company changed insurers, which would be a good thing, but the company we switched to, Blue Cross Blue Shield, simply never covers orthognathic surgery (not much different from the old company!). I had a meeting with the representative when he came to talk to us at work. He told me that they won't help with hospital costs if they aren't helping with the surgery costs.

So let's have a look at where I am financially:
Including the $5k in donations, I have $13.5k of the $15k needed for surgery. However, the hospital costs could be from $10-15k. I won't know how much until after the fact. Even though I am still working and saving, I don't think I'll be able to pull that much out of the hat in two months. It's intimidating and has put me in a funk as of late.

I'm finding it exceedingly hard to be around certain types of people, mainly middle to upper management types who have the notion that you should be able to make a living by "doing nothing" or should be paid more to do what is already an overpaid monkey's job. Nothing enrages me more than Entitled White People. I have no sympathy for someone who doesn't have the excess they've become accustomed to.

I know I'm not as poorly off as I was two years ago. I have a real job working with people I like, and I can buy food and warm things to wear and sleep under. I have a house and a new car and a lovely husband who cooks delicious food (and whose Veteran's benefits allowed us to secure a loan for said house--more economical than paying rent!). I am very grateful for these things. And I hope I will never take them for granted. I feel very lucky to have the good things I have right now.

I saw the last Michael Moore move, Capitalism: A Love Story, with some coworkers. His films are always educational and entertaining, even if he is biased. I felt I learned a lot from it, and it did get me thinking. After the film, one of my coworkers said that he had been hoping for a revolution during the bailout discussions. He said he was disappointed that no one did anything. I asked him why he hadn't done anything himself. He said he had nothing to gain by it. "That's what everyone thinks," I said, "No matter how low on the totem pole, we all fear abandoning the scraps that we have. You could almost say that people like you are the real problem in this country." People who stare out the window wistfully thinking about change but not really doing anything about it.

When I get out of surgery, I want to take up fencing and run for a public office. Any office you think I would be suited to?

iphone blues

Sun, 15 Nov 2009 01:14:44 GMT

I've been working on a mobile site for my company, and that means lots of reading books and lots of testing the site in various mobile browsers. Of course, I own a little pay-as-you-go phone that I don't connect to the internet with, so testing has been difficult. Especially for the iphone.

The only iphone emulator that actually works and is fairly accurate only works on Macs, and I don't have one. So I am reduced to poking at site's through devices I borrow from my coworkers. That's not really developer-friendly.

So I considered that maybe I should by one for development and educational purposes. I looked at what Joe and I pay every month and I did the figures... On a shared plan with me owning an iphone and him on just any old thing (an extra iphone means an additional $30 a month in data plans), it would be $90 a month, which for a couple who spend maybe $50 on their phones each month, it does seem a tad steep. That's an additional $30 a month plus the cost of new devices and connection fees, something an already strained budget no likey. Tack on an extra $60 if he wants an iphone, too.

So a testing device is out of the picture for me, even though I feel I need to be scoping out the mobile web more than ever.

The part that kicks me in the shins the hardest is that in all the mobile books I read, as soon as the authors get to the iphone, they state that it is "revolutionary" and then wax rhapsodic about how Apple revolutionized computers ten years ago and what will Apple revolutionize next... Once they are done licking Steve Jobs's face, they get back to the original aim of that chapter.

But it's not going to be revolutionary if only well-to-do people can afford it. It was only when computers became cheap enough that everyone could own one that things started changing. So I think it's inaccurate to say such things. The concept might be a good one, but it takes mass implementation to be revolutionary.

Edit: Upon writing this, it occurred to me that we could further reduce the household phoen bill to $32 a month by switching Joe to pay-as-you-go. Hot damn!

smart car Halloween Special

Sat, 31 Oct 2009 22:14:44 GMT

The bulk of my Halloween postage is up on my smart car blog:
http://lovemysmartcar.com/2009/its-a-martha-stewart-halloween-smart-car/

There are pictures of my smart car in her devil costume, me in my kitty costume, a DIY guide to making a Halloween wreath, and more!

Please enjoy.

I'm actually sitting this Halloween out. I'm too tired to be the Crow Goddess of Awesome. I just want to hide under the comforter and sleep. I've been working super late on projects to earn extra cash toward my upcoming surgery. Fingers crossed!

Dead Space: Extraction Review (plus how to kill the tentacle boss at the end)

Thu, 08 Oct 2009 01:59:16 GMT

I've been sick since... Saturday morning. My employer tried to insist I take time off, but we've got a big release coming up, and I wanted to get it out the door ASAP since most of it is my work, stripping down the junked up old code into shiny, lean semantic stuff, cutting our bit-weight by 25%--that's a lot of bandwidth for us. A lot. So yes, very important to me personally and the company as a whole. "Like hell I'm taking sick days!" I said, and proceeded to work from home for the entire week under the influence of a fever. Surprisingly, I'm still pretty productive in that state.

But anyway, with all that commuting time I've been saving, I've been playing Dead Space: Extraction for the Wii, which Joe bought to play with his friend Ben over the weekend. I, loving horror and loving to watch Joe play games, was delighted. Until he stopped playing to do house-related stuff. I got tired of waiting for him to get back to playing so I could watch the horror movie unfold, and decided to try playing a scary game by myself for once.

Either the game went easy on me or I'm better at dismembering zombies than I thought. The boys were having trouble with it, but that could easily be a side effect of the alcohol involved... Well, whatever the case, the hard part for me wasn't dying. No, it was being scared to death! I rarely died playing the game, but it got my adrenaline going.

See, Dead Space: Extraction is a rail shooter, meaning you're pulled along through a story rather than having free range all over the place. You go where the camera wants you to go. And the people at Visceral used this to great effect.

I'm a story lover, too. I don't get off on action action action. I need some mystery, some terror, some unspeakable dark somethings hiding in a closet. Otherwise, I get detached from the violence and gore and it gets boring. Dead Space: Extraction has a lot of plot fueling the backstory, and you'll find yourself asking, "Okay, then what happened?" as things are revealed.

So I liked it.

And if you want to know how to kill the final boss, it took me two or three tries, but I figured it out: take a pulse rifle and the line gun and a weapon of choice. Use your pulse rifle on the yellow ball when it appears (and you'll know it when you see it), hit everything else yellow with your standard rivet gun, and sweep the underlings with the line gun. You're good to go.

I'm so tired. I wish for fall in the forest.

Fri, 02 Oct 2009 15:44:29 GMT

I haven't slept enough for the past two weeks. Sleeping in this morning felt heavenly.

I really wish I could travel back to my mom's home in the mountains this weekend, but everything is still in boxes, and my closet and bathroom are wrecks. Plus, I am poor from all the moving. Not that visiting the mountains is expensive, but tight finances tend to make me feel less like travel.

I really wanted to go home at least one weekend this month, but I think this is my only free weekend, as after this, it's all parties and Halloween from here on out.

I just want to flop down in a field of long, dry grass with my dog and nap as the autumnal sun swings low and the cardinals sing high.

I keep getting sick.

Sun, 27 Sep 2009 16:00:32 GMT

Last Tuesday I had to stay home from work after staying up late painting in closets made me nauseated. And this morning, although all I painted yesterday was my chalkboard accent wall of awesome, I woke up unable to focus my eyes, with hot sticky skin and feeling like I wanted to vomit. I managed to stumble down the stairs and curl up on the couch where Joe tucked me in. After a nap, I feel a lot better. I wish I knew why I felt so awful this morning. I haven't ben marathon painting since Wednesday. What gives?

Since I can't organize my office as long as the accent wall and trim remain unpainted, I'm going to focus on my closets today. I am deeply excited about buying a $10 slide-out tie rack for my scarves and belts. No longer will they pine for me from the depths of hat boxes, yearning for me to remember them. No, they shall be in full view and easy reach at all times, YES!

New house; No office; 24 Hour Comics Day Cometh

Sun, 27 Sep 2009 04:52:28 GMT

We've moved into the house. I'm so glad I stayed up till midnight, 2, even 4 in the morning to finish painting our bedroom and my home office. Sadly, I was unable to finish my home office before moving, for no matter how fast I painted, the chalkboard paint for my accent wall demands 24 hours of drying time. I will finish trimming the room on Monday and then, THEN I can finally start putting the room to right.

Wow. My first house. Without Joe's VA loan, it woulda taken years for us to get a house. The house rocks. But I'm so tired. Two whole weeks of relentless painting. Urf.

And then Tessa reminds me that 24 Hour Comics Day is next weekend. Lately I've been down on myself for not comicking enough (major reasons for this are 1)working my ass off and 2)not having a site to upload anything quickly to). Part of me wants to do a comic, but I know I won't have a home office ready in time, nor do I have any friends planning to make a comic at the same time, so there's no one to do it with. Aww, so sad. Plus, I may just be freaking tired.

Which I am now. So off to bed. Just wanted to let you know where I am and why I've been so quiet!

Cartoonists on Health Care: Speak up

Mon, 14 Sep 2009 13:20:16 GMT

Check it out: http://blog.cagle.com/jones/2009/09/12/obama-health-care-and-me/

Confirms my suspicions that most full-time freelance artists get their insurance through a spouse.

Teh fumes eated my brain

Sun, 13 Sep 2009 06:59:12 GMT

We closed on the house on the 10th. I tidied up all my personal projects prior to closing braced for it: nonstop painting.

Joe is working on fixing everything else that is wrong with the new house. My job is solely to paint our bedroom and my office. Oh, and their respective closets 'cuz Joe's smell like cat pee (need bleach, lots of bleach).

My mom would be proud of me, putting down drop cloths, scrambling up ladders, getting covered in white specs of primer. It took me all day to prime the bedroom. Even with the windows open and the fan on, the fumes get rough. Once you start priming, it's hard to find a stopping point to go eat, and I find myself falling over from time to time from low blood sugar. Joe brings me water to hydrate with, at least! Otherwise I'd dry up!

Joe is highly amused that I am also painting the ceilings. I know it's a lot of extra work, but everything in the house is beige with white trim because it was a rental. And I hate beige. A lot.

Knowing that a scruffy ceiling can completely destroy the effect of shiny fresh walls, I cannot leave them. Not even in the closets. Yes. I'm anal about these things. Painting those two rooms will be a total pain once we're moved in, so it's important that we do it right before we get the furniture in.

We don't have much cash left after closing, so we're not doing much renovating or updating. I'm glad we can do a little painting to spruce it up a bit! Because we probably won't have much for movers, we're hauling bits and pieces of things with us each time we drive over there to work. I plan to load my smart car Roxi up with books each night before work so I can drop them off on my way home. I have a lot of books. I hate having to move them all at once! But hopefully this way we can get it all down to just some random larger pieces and movers won't cost so much.

Lastly, Joe splurged and got me an ironing board that can fold into the wall. I've been wanting one forever! It has a mini-arm for ironing shirt cuffs, too. Now I'll be able to handle his dry cleaning, saving us even more money. Score! It'll pay for itself!

So yes. Painting. Painting all weekend.

Hard to Relate

Wed, 09 Sep 2009 05:16:27 GMT

I wish more people understood my Jaw Problem.

Since my Quest for a Jaw That Works began in March 2008 (with much thanks to my closest friends for pushing me and the charity along--I'm much too proud to have done this without much coaxing), I have had to relate so many people exactly why I'm on the phone with insurance in the parking lot shouting, or why I can't eat out with them because I'm saving pennies and packing my lunch, or why there's a great big charity fund on my site. I try to avoid talking about it because most people just don't get it.

It's hard to express to someone that you're saving, saving, saving because there's a surgery coming up that costs as much as their BMW. It's hard to explain that it's for something they can't see needs fixed. It's hard to tell your friends that you can't come out to play on the weekend because you've accepted a load of freelance work. It's hard to explain to your boss that you didn't really get a weekend, you just came home and went to work. And it's hard to explain to your fans why you haven't made a new comic in over a year because every spare moment you have is spent chasing the dollar, something you never ever wanted to do. It's hard to explain that you had to let go of doing something you loved and really felt good at because there was no way to get that money from the pay that comicking brought in.

I'm lucky to have a husband who supports me. I'm lucky to have friends who support me and push me so hard. I'm lucky to have a boss who understands my weekend freelancing. I'm lucky to have patient fans. I'm extremely lucky.

Most people I meet don't understand what I'm going through when they find out about it. They just sort of shrug and try to pretend it's not happening to me or occasionally swing the other way entirely and stop seeing me and start seeing My Problem like it's all there is to me, and oh how I don't want to be seen as a charity specimen. But some folks get it. Some of my coworkers, several web dev company execs I've known, and friends, of course. To them I am eternally grateful for making me feel accepted, acknowledged and cared for.

I was writing thank-you notes tonight. It gets me thinking. Thank you.

New blog: lovemysmartcar.com

Tue, 08 Sep 2009 01:56:15 GMT

I'm sorry I've been missing in action lately. Last you heard, I up-and-got-married, didn't I? Well, there's a reason. Several. One of which was that my budgie Tenno got sick, and I had to rush him back and forth to the vet so they could operate on his little feeties and remove some abscesss. (Cause: his refusal to eat anything but millet. Still fighting to get him to eat something different.) And then of course there was a long letter I had to write to the insurance folks to tell them I damn well need jaw surgery and here's ten reasons why (which I might post later for funzies). But one of the most prominent reasons for my scarcity would be my latest pet project, lovemysmartcar.com.

I spent Labor Day weekend laboring to finish it. It's a site where I can blog obsessively about every little trip I take, playlist I create, picture I snap and maintenance I perform. I even made a playlist for you!

I built it partly because I couldn't find any smart car experience blogs when I was deciding which car to buy. I thought, "Wouldn't it be great if someone got a smart car, then blogged about what it was like driving up mountains, getting the tires changed for winter, what it feels like in a storm." Then I remembered, oh yeah! I make web sites!

The blog has been up for a few months now, mainly because I wanted to generate content and get it listed in search engines before I launched, so I opted for a "soft launch," focusing on getting the content and core functions together before slapping the design on and releasing it with a big fanfare.

Another reason for posting to a half-baked site was that half way through the design process, my bird got sick just as a really stupid picture started making the rounds on Twitter. People would tweet, "Can you spot the smart car?" and link to the picture which was of a car crushed between two trucks. It wasn't even a smart car, so I knew I had to use my powers for good and set the record straight. I posted a big-ass, Search engine optimized rebuttal and percolated it through Twitter. Soon it rose to the upper reaches of Google's search results on all things "smart car crash"-related and the site landed 2700 unique visitors in its first month as people searching for the truth found my post. A week after my posting, Snopes posted the truth and the matter was settled, the pictures stopped being circulated, and all was well in the land of smart cars. I won't make any cash from this. It's more of a showcase piece than anything, a proof of concept that shows I can do organic search engine optimization and reach an audience through social media. A big part of me just wanted to show that my skills could compliment a product line like the smart car. I really flexed my muscles on this one, and I am pleased with the results.

That said, I'm open to your opinions and critiques. I want to come back to this in a month and improve it even more after I see how people use it.

I'm taking a break from personal site projects to do some more commercial freelance work, paint our new house (Ah yes, news! We close on the 10th!), and draw more art cards for my corrective jaw surgery donators.

So please, tell me what you think?

I have a husband!

Tue, 04 Aug 2009 04:21:00 GMT

Joe and I are married!

That's the new hubby and me after signing the papers at the magistrate's.

Of course, I'm keeping my last name because I already have a body of comic work and an award under it, but I did offer the Nabors family name to my sweetheart. He kindly declined and kept his own for similar reasons ;)

We'd been toying with the idea of eloping for some time. Recently we've been negotiating the purchase of a house (at least we'll be putting money into a piece of property instead of throwing it out the window on rent--it works out to be the same monthly payment). Also, with insurance refusing to chip in for my $20,000 jaw surgery, our financials were starting to get complicated. We were already married in every way but by the law, so there really was nothing stopping us, and marrying sooner rather than later would make buying a house and such a lot easier and safer.

But we wanted it to be a surprise!

We swore each other to secrecy and decided to run off and do it at the magistrate's office on the morning of August third. I ended up telling my mother (who would have been upset if I hadn't let her know before we got hitched) and one coworker who I thought I could trust to be quiet, but she told another coworker who was, of course, soon after sworn to secrecy (and to the young lady's credit, she kept it a secret!). They then tried to convince me to let them throw a party for me to make up for my lack of white chiffon wedding gown and ugly bridesmaid dresses, but I dug my heels in and refused. Eventually they came back with a girls' night out, and I thought that was great idea and invited Caitlin along (who was also sworn to secrecy). And that was Friday night's girls' night out! My coworkers generously gave me a bottle of champagne to share with my new husband after the blessed event, which was grand because I would have had no idea what kind to buy. All in all it was a lovely time with a bunch of lovely ladies, and I couldn't have been happier unless all my friends who live so far away had been able to come (Leigh, Lauren, Tessa...)

So there we were in the magistrate's office this morning, dingy and windowless as it was, and he told us we needed two witnesses. But we had packed everything but two witnesses!

What would we do? We went into town, looking for someone, anyone, but everything was closed on Mondays. Finally we asked some complete strangers in front of the jail/courthouse if they would help us out, and the ladies kindly acquiesced. We were to be wed after all! The day was saved!

There was a very hurried taking of vows so the women could get back to their affairs, followed by a stern lecture from the magistrate on the importance of changing my name through social security, if I wished it (in spite of my repeated denials that that would ever be the case--I guess he was trying to be safe!).

Then we came home, toppled over, and drank the bubbly, which made me a giggling fool for awhile! But I hydrated thoroughly and there will not be a hangover in the morning.

And that, my friends, was Rachel's Wedding Day!

Oh come now, I realize we still have to do something public. I must grab Joe's hand and claim him for my own in front of more than three strangers. So this October, before the Halloween parties start, we're going to have a Wedding Warming/House Reception party in our new home. We will be registered if people feel the need to bring gifts, but with the economy limping along like it is, we want guest to know that bringing nothing more than their delightful selves is enough for us! We'll do something public with exchanging our rings and making some statements of undying tenderness that will make everyone tear up or start laughing, or both, I'm sure.

Speaking of rings, I'm getting Joe a tungsten one he liked from an online store, and we left my engagement ring with the most awesome of jewlers in Chapel Hill. The man is like an alchemist! I wanted to have my wedding band made out of my engagement ring. It seemed the logical thing to do. I just wanted the setting lower so the diamond would not catch on my clothes and things. Later on, when money isn't so tight, I would like to add a band of rose gold to make the ring look sturdier and more like a wedding band.

Some day, we may do a formal ceremony on an anniversary. And next year we may make our honeymoon to Philadelphia happen. But this year, all the money that would go toward a wedding is going into a house or being hoarded for surgery. But I'm okay with it. Big weddings have always seemed as boring as school assemblies to me, and the stress of planning and performing in one would kill me. I never played "bride" with my Barbie doll.

I guess what I'm trying to say is that there are more important things than one day with a person when your whole life stretches out before you both. I had a blast with Joe today, and I hope we always will have this much fun, no matter what the Universe throws at us.

You can read more about the happy if not stealthy event at my husband's blog.

Blogged with the Flock Browser

Of Bumblefoot and Health Care Reform

Sun, 02 Aug 2009 00:16:47 GMT

Last night I had a real girls' night out with my coworkers Jenn and Krystal and my friend Caitlin. There were many tapas and drinks!

This morning I made a quick run to the vet. Tenno the budgie is sick again, now with bumble foot! The vet has him on antibiotics and pain killers. $200 because the little dude won't eat anything but millet (vitamin A deficiency contributes to immune deficiency and a poor diet may give him kidney disease and result in his needing to be put down if he starts getting uric acid deposits). So I spent the afternoon putting moleskin on his perches.

On the way home, I stopped by the library and picked up some books on CD, notably some sci-fi classics, "Tess of the D'urbervilles" and a music appreciation course.

Outside the library were two volunteers trying to collect signatures in support of Obama's health care reform to send to our representatives. I stopped to sign, filled out a postcard, grabbed and handful of postcards to give to other people, offered to volunteer, and most importantly, I got the email and mailing addresses of my state's representatives. I figure if I can spend so much time writing long, whiny blog posts about my need for surgery, I can write even longer, whinier letters to my representatives in congress and the senate.

So which do you think is better, email or snail mail?

Only covered if...

Wed, 22 Jul 2009 20:02:44 GMT

"Orthognathic surgery is only covered on your policy if it is to correct acute obstructive sleep apnea, not related to TMJ."

That's a wall.

The bad news: my insurance excludes orthognathic surgery.

Tue, 21 Jul 2009 02:39:41 GMT

Here it is all fast and furious:

1. I'm going to need upper jaw surgery to correct my painful crossbite.
2. I've already gotten the braces needed for the first stages of correction thanks to the lovely people who have been giving me money.
3. I need surgery in one year. One year.
4. The surgery involves cutting my upper jaw in three places and my lower jaw in one.
5. It will cost about $15,000 for the surgery with an additional $5,000 in hospital costs for a grand total of $20,000, plus or minus.
6. My insurance people wrote me back that "orthognathic surgery is excluded on your policy." The one I'm paying through my nose for.
7. Because it is excluded in the policy, there is no real way to argue with them further.
8. In short, I don't know how I will pay for this.
9. But I thank everyone for all their support, even through these horrid economical times. It means a lot to me and gives me hope.

I will post my next plan of action when I puzzle it out.

I now have a smartcar and her name is Roxy.

Wed, 15 Jul 2009 14:53:21 GMT

I now have a smartcar and her name is Roxy.

Smartcar names.

Tue, 14 Jul 2009 02:57:12 GMT

I need to name the car. So far everyone seems to think it's a girl, but I still think "Napolean" would be an awesome name.

Here are the girly girl names:

Bebe
Scarlet

You guys helped me come up with thepinkcrow.com's URL. Now sway me! Sway me, I beg of you! Either support one of the above or suggest something else. (By the way, I would have called her Bunny, but I had a bad experience with a girl by that name once.)

Also, please keep in mind that I'll probably end up accenting the car's white exterior with red reflective hearts cut out of reflective safety tape.

My new smart car, week one

Fri, 10 Jul 2009 22:55:17 GMT

Expect many more pictures like the following in the upcoming weeks.

The new smart car on Flickr

I bought my first car Monday night. Well, she's not the first car I've owned, but she was the first that I bought. When the 14-year-old family station wagon I was driving started to prove not as reliable as she used to be, I was forced to upgrade in order to continue my commute. So instead of pouting in a corner (which I am wont to do), I chose to look at this obstacle as an adventure. If I had to get a new car, it was going to be on my terms. It had to meet certain criteria of price, efficiency, comfort and style, in that order.

Meet the Smart Car from Mercedes. With prices starting around $13,000, it's as affordable as a Honda Fit and gets better mileage (about 40 mpg). And yes, the smart car is safe. It's very safe.

You call me small. I call you oversized.
After driving the Smart for a few days, I no longer think of it as small. This is truly "a little dog who thinks she's a big dog." Her interior is about as roomy as most larger vehicles', and it's easy to forget that I'm in a car half the size of everyone else's. That is, until I park. When I get out, I realize how big the other cars are, and to be quite honest, I wonder how they manage to haul themselves up and down the roads.

Go go go like a bunny!
My Smart loves to accelerate. I notice that she can be a bit stodgy about darting out quickly into traffic from a stand still, but that may just be because I've not got the hang of her paddle shifters yet. But once she is actually on the road, she's so happy to go faster and faster and faster. On the highway, she'll just zip along with surprising acceleration and maneuverability. It makes sense. She's small. She's nimble. It doesn't take much power to push such a light load, and it doesn't take much room for her to pass another car.

But rest assured I am driving responsibly! I make sure she doesn't scoot over 75 mph on the highway home, even though she wants to!

Lap of luxury
With a sunroof, posh red upholstery and a symphonic deluxe sound system, driving in my Smart with the classics station playing feels like I have balcony seats at the opera house. For the past week I have been giving rides to anyone who wants to go, and it's become one of the preferred methods of transit for a few friends.

Attention Getter
This car does the very thing I hoped it would do: get people to notice me.

I know it sounds shallow, but it's why some designers buy iphones or Macs. I was tired of everyone getting the cool gadgets way ahead of me because I couldn't afford them. So when I realized I would have to lay out my hard-earned cash for a car, I was determined to spend my money on something that would make me look good and perhaps even make me stand out to future clients.

In short, I wanted to make an impression.

And how the car makes an impression! Everyone wants to see it, everyone wants to ride it, and it makes people smile to see her on the street. She's like the girl at the party who makes all the wallflowers come to life. She has helped me socially, as I am no longer a ride-mooch. I am now a proud chariot driver!

If you can't beat them, join them.
So you know I hate(d) driving. I prefer to walk everywhere. And at one point in my life, I could do that. I even had a motorcycle for distance travel. But now I'm in an area where walking is not an option unless you have the money to buy a house in the pricy downtown areas. So I have to use a car.

But there's no reason I have to use the same kind of car everyone else is using! The Smart let's me do individual transportation my way, without strapping me to a gas sucking behemoth.

An entry-level Prius
She get's the highest mpg of any non-hybrid car on the market. I initially yearned for a hybrid, but I new I couldn't afford one. The Smart Car isn't a hybrid. It's just incredibly efficient. And it's made in an environmentally friendly way with recycled and recycleable parts! And in 2010-12, the fully electric Smart Car hits American shores. I will be there with bells on!

The Ride
I can blast the air-conditioning in the little car while driving fast, a big plus down here in the sweltering south. I deeply appreciate not showing up to work as a ball of sweat and dirt.

The ride is smooth, but because of the small wheel base, I do feel bumps in the road. But they aren't too taxing.

One man asked if larger vehicles made my car hard to control. Not really. You can feel them passing the same way you would on a motorcycle, which is a help in tricky highspeed situations. You might not see the big rig coming, but you can just feel it enough to be alert. But most of the time I outstrip them all. That said, large vehicles like trucks do produce a gentle tug on the car, but it's nothing distressing. I don't know how she would fair in hurricane-produced winds, though. But I will surely blog about my experiences when we encounter them!

That's all for now. Later I'm going to post more pictures and a new roadtrip playlist.

You realize I'm a bit obsessed with my new car, right? Jenna at work, who is a BMW driver and lover, laughs and is happy that I'm so enthusiastic about it. I'm glad, too. If I weren't so happy about the new car, I'd probably feel pretty bad about saddling myself with debt and liability. But it feels more like responsibility and adventure because I got a cute, entry level care that does everything I wanted it to do for very little money.

I don't feel guilty about buying this car in any way, which is perhaps the best part about it. Not financially nor environmentally do I angst.

I have a car.

Tue, 07 Jul 2009 02:47:00 GMT

Changes are rarely welcome. And they almost always come in clumps.

I wasn't surprised to find that I would need to buy a new car so close to us needing to move (and hopefully buy a home). I won't be surprised if one of the pets dies next. Tenno's been looking poorly lately. Might need to get him check out.

Part of it is the weather. Extreme heat and extreme cold break car parts, overload animal land plant bodies, and impose new expenses. Toss in a few coincidences, and you have a recipe for what appears to be bad luck.

I purchased my first car today.

It is the pretty white and black Smartcar with the red upholstery. The price tag said $15,000, but in the end, it was more like $17,000, what with taxes, fees, accessories, and other things. But she's mine now. And even though I ache with burden of shelling out $280 a month for the next five years, I've given myself permission to feel happy, excited, and in love with my petite car. If you're going to be tortured, you might as well enjoy it.

So let me revel in my small triumphs:

I got the 4.2% APR financing without needing anyone to cosign! I'm an adult! Woo! Taking out that $3000 loan to pay for Sadie two years ago then paying it back in two months was a brilliant move!
They gave me $500 for Ruby in trade-in.
I did not give in to temptation by spending an extra $2000 for the cabriolet model, which is a convertible. And you know how I love convertibles Too Wong Foo-style. I also did not buy the $350+ chrome fittings.
I did get the six CD changer and advanced speaker system because all I do in my car is listen to books on tape. I figured, what the heck, you only get to customize your new car once.
It has heated seats. I didn't want this. It was just there.

I am in love with the car, and that's grand! Because if I resented her, I'd be really miserable right now.

But it was so hard to say goodbye to Ruby, so surreal. She was there, and then I went in to sign papers, and when I came back, she was gone and all of my things were in the new car. I miss her. She was a comforting motherly car.

That said, the Smartcar climbs hills in 5th gear, zooms along incredibly fast, and shifts smooth as silk. I love driving her with the sunroof's shade open and the clouds overhead. I love how much I feel like I'm close to the road with her, like I'm experiencing the act of driving, not passively, but actively. In that regard, she's a lot like a motorcycle. You feel like you're right there in the thick of it.

I have to call the insurance guys to see how much my rates will increase with full coverage tomorrow. Yay for being an adult!

What am I doing with my life? Getting braces? Buying a car? Getting married? Maybe this is normal for other people, but I never thought any of it would happen to me, at least not so soon!

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She is my princess.

Sat, 04 Jul 2009 04:25:54 GMT

The Smart ForTwo Passion

We are in love. Don't try to stop our forbidden passion! The Honda Fit tried and failed to separate us due to its chintzy interior (although it was a smoother, quieter ride).

Joe and I went out car-trying today. I started out at Carmax with the mini coop from BMW, and it was fun but cramped. Then we moved on to more conservative cars: a Nissan Versa, a Honda Civic Hybrid, and a Honda Fit. The Honda Fit stood out as the best of them all, so we trotted over to the Honda dealer to try a standard shift (as I abhor automatics--I'd like to keep that extra three miles per gallon, thank you).

On our way to Honda, though, Joe got excited at the sight of the Smart Car dealer growing like a tumor off the side of Mercedez and wanted us to take one for a spin. The little bumble bee cars made me giggle, they were so wee!

Then I got to drive one.

It gets 40 mpg on average, the highest non-hybrid MPG you can get.
It has a hybrid transmission that works like a manual, only the car controls the clutch.
It has no back seat, which I never use! Hoorah!
It is made with a high percentage of recycled materials and is mostly (if not all) recyclable itself.
Mercedez quality and safety. Sweet.
RED INTERIOR UPHOLSTRY. I mean, do I need to say more?

Two of them fit in a parking space! They are so cool!

And it costs about as much as a Fit.

After our little adventure, we got back to Honda, and I tried a beautiful red standard-shift Fit. And it was just lovely. Only, after driving the little Smart car around... I just couldn't fall in love again. It felt cheap inside, and bigger than it needed to be. In short, it didn't feel like a Mercedez.

There is a hiccup, though.

Although the awesome dude at Sears got Ruby's spark plug out AND retapped the socket (I love him for this and am so glad I left her over night) and she is running again, she's running rougher than she did. I worry about her failing me again, as she has been nothing but trouble for the past three months. I fear a repeat of this debacle. Coworkers and bosses can be but only so patient and sympathetic.

So it behooves me to get this baby now. They have the one I want in Raleigh, waiting for my beckoning. But...

We are house shopping. We want to buy a house in the next 90 days. We will eed to secure a loan. Joe is a veteran, so he's very sure the Veteran's Association will make it so we cannot be turned down, but the the advisor at the bank told me making such a large purchase so close to house buying would be a bad thing to do. The man at Honda countered that such a purchase would not be visible on my records for 30 days.

So I don't know what to do? Bite the bullet and take the plunge, ensuring my safe travels? Or cross my fingers that Ruby hangs in there and keep going until we close on a house? What to do? I want a damn car that I know isn't going to strand me 45 minutes from my home or work!

And Car Max appraised Ruby for $300. Her tires are worth more! Yeah, she's going to NPR. At that price, I'd rather give her away and bless the whole transition with good karma.

Le sigh!

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Shite. I need a new car. Any suggestions?

Thu, 02 Jul 2009 02:55:44 GMT

Ruby, my mom's 1995 Ford Escort Stationwagon, is a goner. She was choppy this morning, so I tried to replace her spark plugs with the help of some people from work (some very awesome people, I might add, who got sweat and hot on my account). But I couldn't get one of her plugs out. So I took her to Sears, and they couldn't either. It would involve a machine shop and retooling, and it would probably cost more than the car is worth.

I had to leaver her there over night because she's got the bower of a lawn mower now. There's no way I can drive her home on the commute.

So. I'm donating her to the local NPR station and bying a new car this weekend.

Can I afford a new car? No. Do I have a choice in the matter? Not if I want to keep my job!

So, Livejournal friends, I ask you, what cars do you recommend for leggy tall girls? No trucks or SUVs, thank you. I need a gas sipper, in the 30+ MPG range. Preferably Japanese.

Any ideas?

I hate it when circumstances force my hand, but some things have to be done.

Art: "I Will Spit You Out"

Tue, 30 Jun 2009 03:50:26 GMT

I Will Spit You Out by ~rachelthegreat on deviantART
This was made using a sketch, a monochrome palette, and a lot of textures.

I wanted to give the impression of someone facing huge odds fearlessly without having to draw those odds, but I don't think I made the canvas tall enough. Nonetheless, I used tasty textures from BittBox:
http://www.bittbox.com/freebies/free-texture-tuesday-oil-stains/

I was thinking this would make a good chapter cover. What are your thoughts on it? Did I succeed in my mission?

Music: "Kiss and Tell" by Bis OR "Spitfire" by Prodigy.

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"Me Draw Pretty One Day "

Sat, 20 Jun 2009 04:16:31 GMT

We all have these days.

Me Draw Pretty One Day by ~rachelthegreat on deviantART

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Poverty in style.

Thu, 11 Jun 2009 01:07:57 GMT

I'm very sick and have had to take a few days off work. I hope I can do a half-day tomorrow and work from home. I have a lot of stuff that needs doing, but my boss is being so kind and considerate. Really everyone is. I am deeply touched by the number of inquiries as to my health and expressions of concern that I have received since I became sick with what Joe had.

Now let's talk summer style.

My car, as you may or may not know, recently sucked like a thousand dollars out of my bank account be needing various little bits of repairs and tire and oil changes, all in succession. This only makes sense now that I am driving her at least one and a half hours, usually more, four days a week. Naturally these things would show up more rapidly than when I just used her to scoot over for client interviews. Additionally, she's a 1995 Ford Escort Station Wagon, meaning she no likey to accelerate AND do AC at the same time. Back on the mountain, I could turn it on on a down hill slope, or let it run so long as the max speed limit was 45 miles an hour. But on my commute, I have to do at least 70 for most of it, during which time air conditioning would only let me do 60. OR maybe 55 on the uphills.

So I've determined that I shall simply put on my rhinestone-studded sunglasses, tie a scarf over my head ala ye olden Hollywood starletts, and drive to work with the windows down and Ladytron blasting.

I got to do this for all of one day before getting sick, but I enjoyed it!

Now I have another problem. I only have two pairs of warm weather shoes I can wear to the office: my maryjanes from Sofft, which require stockings, and a pair of red peep-toe flats, which happen to be a size too small (I did not know this at the time of purchase). The former require me to dress too warmly for the commute to be tolerable (boo on stockings + heat) and the latter make my feet go into spasms after wearing for two consecutive days.

Acknowledging that the temperatures won't be going down at least until September, you can imagine that I found this situation to be intolerable. So in spite of low funds, I authorized the purchase of a pair of Sofft's Vanna's from Zappos. They cost about $100, but my other Soffts have held up for over a year with no degradation, and they feel great on my feet. Zappos delivered them yesterday, and I look forward to going back to work with much cooler legs :)

Sofft really is a great brand. Cool, contemporary shoes in a huge range of styles and sizes. I look forward to owning mine for many years.

Fresh Art Sunday

Sun, 07 Jun 2009 18:24:03 GMT

I'm trying to pump out a "finished" piece of artwork every week now to gear up for drawing comics again and/or animating. I'm way rusty. My repertoire of poses has gone down, and my foreshortening magic has fizzled. It'll be a tough fight to get back up to speed, but I thought it would be fun to try new things in the process.

This picture was inked on paper, scanned, livetraced and spot-colored in Illustrator, then spray painted in Photoshop.

I might use it as a chapter cover in an upcoming comic.

No Longer Required by ~rachelthegreat on deviantART

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