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You are viewing the most recent 20 entries July 4th, 200912:25 am: She is my princess.
The Smart ForTwo PassionWe are in love. Don't try to stop our forbidden passion! The Honda Fit tried and failed to separate us due to its chintzy interior (although it was a smoother, quieter ride). Joe and I went out car-trying today. I started out at Carmax with the mini coop from BMW, and it was fun but cramped. Then we moved on to more conservative cars: a Nissan Versa, a Honda Civic Hybrid, and a Honda Fit. The Honda Fit stood out as the best of them all, so we trotted over to the Honda dealer to try a standard shift (as I abhor automatics--I'd like to keep that extra three miles per gallon, thank you). On our way to Honda, though, Joe got excited at the sight of the Smart Car dealer growing like a tumor off the side of Mercedez and wanted us to take one for a spin. The little bumble bee cars made me giggle, they were so wee! Then I got to drive one. It gets 40 mpg on average, the highest non-hybrid MPG you can get. It has a hybrid transmission that works like a manual, only the car controls the clutch. It has no back seat, which I never use! Hoorah! It is made with a high percentage of recycled materials and is mostly (if not all) recyclable itself. Mercedez quality and safety. Sweet. RED INTERIOR UPHOLSTRY. I mean, do I need to say more? Two of them fit in a parking space! They are so cool! And it costs about as much as a Fit. After our little adventure, we got back to Honda, and I tried a beautiful red standard-shift Fit. And it was just lovely. Only, after driving the little Smart car around... I just couldn't fall in love again. It felt cheap inside, and bigger than it needed to be. In short, it didn't feel like a Mercedez. There is a hiccup, though. Although the awesome dude at Sears got Ruby's spark plug out AND retapped the socket (I love him for this and am so glad I left her over night) and she is running again, she's running rougher than she did. I worry about her failing me again, as she has been nothing but trouble for the past three months. I fear a repeat of this debacle. Coworkers and bosses can be but only so patient and sympathetic. So it behooves me to get this baby now. They have the one I want in Raleigh, waiting for my beckoning. But... We are house shopping. We want to buy a house in the next 90 days. We will eed to secure a loan. Joe is a veteran, so he's very sure the Veteran's Association will make it so we cannot be turned down, but the the advisor at the bank told me making such a large purchase so close to house buying would be a bad thing to do. The man at Honda countered that such a purchase would not be visible on my records for 30 days. So I don't know what to do? Bite the bullet and take the plunge, ensuring my safe travels? Or cross my fingers that Ruby hangs in there and keep going until we close on a house? What to do? I want a damn car that I know isn't going to strand me 45 minutes from my home or work! And Car Max appraised Ruby for $300. Her tires are worth more! Yeah, she's going to NPR. At that price, I'd rather give her away and bless the whole transition with good karma. Le sigh!
July 1st, 200910:55 pm: Shite. I need a new car. Any suggestions?
Ruby, my mom's 1995 Ford Escort Stationwagon, is a goner. She was choppy this morning, so I tried to replace her spark plugs with the help of some people from work (some very awesome people, I might add, who got sweat and hot on my account). But I couldn't get one of her plugs out. So I took her to Sears, and they couldn't either. It would involve a machine shop and retooling, and it would probably cost more than the car is worth. I had to leaver her there over night because she's got the bower of a lawn mower now. There's no way I can drive her home on the commute. So. I'm donating her to the local NPR station and bying a new car this weekend. Can I afford a new car? No. Do I have a choice in the matter? Not if I want to keep my job! So, Livejournal friends, I ask you, what cars do you recommend for leggy tall girls? No trucks or SUVs, thank you. I need a gas sipper, in the 30+ MPG range. Preferably Japanese. Any ideas? I hate it when circumstances force my hand, but some things have to be done.
June 10th, 200909:07 pm: Poverty in style.
I'm very sick and have had to take a few days off work. I hope I can do a half-day tomorrow and work from home. I have a lot of stuff that needs doing, but my boss is being so kind and considerate. Really everyone is. I am deeply touched by the number of inquiries as to my health and expressions of concern that I have received since I became sick with what Joe had. Now let's talk summer style. My car, as you may or may not know, recently sucked like a thousand dollars out of my bank account be needing various little bits of repairs and tire and oil changes, all in succession. This only makes sense now that I am driving her at least one and a half hours, usually more, four days a week. Naturally these things would show up more rapidly than when I just used her to scoot over for client interviews. Additionally, she's a 1995 Ford Escort Station Wagon, meaning she no likey to accelerate AND do AC at the same time. Back on the mountain, I could turn it on on a down hill slope, or let it run so long as the max speed limit was 45 miles an hour. But on my commute, I have to do at least 70 for most of it, during which time air conditioning would only let me do 60. OR maybe 55 on the uphills. So I've determined that I shall simply put on my rhinestone-studded sunglasses, tie a scarf over my head ala ye olden Hollywood starletts, and drive to work with the windows down and Ladytron blasting. I got to do this for all of one day before getting sick, but I enjoyed it! Now I have another problem. I only have two pairs of warm weather shoes I can wear to the office: my maryjanes from Sofft, which require stockings, and a pair of red peep-toe flats, which happen to be a size too small (I did not know this at the time of purchase). The former require me to dress too warmly for the commute to be tolerable (boo on stockings + heat) and the latter make my feet go into spasms after wearing for two consecutive days. Acknowledging that the temperatures won't be going down at least until September, you can imagine that I found this situation to be intolerable. So in spite of low funds, I authorized the purchase of a pair of Sofft's Vanna's from Zappos. They cost about $100, but my other Soffts have held up for over a year with no degradation, and they feel great on my feet. Zappos delivered them yesterday, and I look forward to going back to work with much cooler legs :) Sofft really is a great brand. Cool, contemporary shoes in a huge range of styles and sizes. I look forward to owning mine for many years.
June 7th, 200902:23 pm: Fresh Art Sunday
I'm trying to pump out a "finished" piece of artwork every week now to gear up for drawing comics again and/or animating. I'm way rusty. My repertoire of poses has gone down, and my foreshortening magic has fizzled. It'll be a tough fight to get back up to speed, but I thought it would be fun to try new things in the process. This picture was inked on paper, scanned, livetraced and spot-colored in Illustrator, then spray painted in Photoshop. I might use it as a chapter cover in an upcoming comic. 
No Longer Required by ~rachelthegreat on deviantART
May 11th, 200902:10 am: NYC Cravings and Surgeon Stuff
NYC CravingsA coworker of mine went up to New York City this weekend for fun times with friends. It's gotten me all wistful about the big city and my friends there. I want to go back again. Doctor and Surgeon VisitsYou know, corporate jobs are supposed to mean steady income, but all I've been getting ever since has been one bill after the other. First the car, then contacts, trips to doctors, blah! I feel just as poor as ever, but at least things are being taken care of. The doctor tells me to get more exercise (I know I'm fairly active, but apparently not active enough to keep my HDL levels up). So I'm saving for that bathing suit so I can start swimming while I do the laundry (the laundromat is right next to the pool here) and after work. I have seen the orthognathic surgeon regarding my teeth, but I haven't had the chance to speak with the financial person yet. It'll be rough. It's confirmed that I need upper and lower. She was very frank, and I appreciate her honesty. Upper jaw needs cut in three places. Lower, just one. A year later, after the swelling goes down, I may or may not want to get a little cosmetic touch up surgery with my soft tissues. There's a risk I'll lose all feeling in my jaw if they sever that main nerve. It was a very depressing conversation. But I press forward still!
May 10th, 200912:16 am: A day at the museum, and I'm jones-ing for a NYC trip.
Hey there. I know you haven't heard much from me recently. I'm finally starting to feel settled in my new job. I'm going on my fourth month there, and I still have a nice head of steam. My coworkers are the nicest people I've ever worked with, and I'm very happy to be with them. This is one of the first weekends I've had where I've had absolutely no obligations to anyone but myself (I still freelance on the side, write articles, help friends, and so on). So we went to he Nasher museum! I had a delicious lunch, which I hope to have over and over again. One installment was this awesome puppet show called Baby Marx. I was lucky enough to have found a youtube version of it.
April 17th, 200912:27 am: Rejection
I've always fancied myself immune to most types of rejection. Rejection letters, negative critiques, dismissals, none of that ever really seems to stop me, or not for long. Like a zombie shot in the chest with a bullet, I just get back up and keep pressing forward. But some kinds of rejection are much more effective, like a bullet to the head or spine. Personal rejections cause me to stumble and collapse. What I hate is when I can feel I want to cry, for days even, and I just haven't quite worked up to it. It's hanging there, around the edges of my eyes. And then one day, out of the blue, I cave in on myself, heaving not from my chest but pulling in from my abdominals, as though my own body were kicking me in the gut, sending me to my knees, forcing me to wince. And at that moment, all I can feel is that I'm not deserving of anything good in the world. It was times like these that my dog Kitty would come to me and lick at the tears on my face. She is a good dog, and whenever she saw me upset, it deeply disturbed her. No matter how wronged I felt or how worthless my actions had lead me to believe I was, Kitty would be there, licking at my face, saying, "It's ok. I'll always love you. Please don't be sad. I will stay with you until you see that things get better." Being with Kitty taught me much more about being human than all my years on this earth ever had. It was harder for me to leave my dog behind when I moved out on my own than it was for me to leave my own mother (who I love all the same, but it's different). And now that I live so far from her, when I cry, I cry extra hard because she's not there, holding my hand as it were, telling me that she alone could still see the good in me and the world, and that she would still love me, no matter what. There is no greater cure for the despair of rejection than the unconditional love of a friend.
April 12th, 200901:59 pm: Spring: The Blackening
This Easter Sunday, while everyone is gorging on chocolate and making forays into that thing we know as "sunshine", I'm in the kitchen with a great big steaming pot of black. Yep, it's the Blackening season. What I'm doing is re-dyeing all my black spring/summer clothes, which have turned grey and scuffed around the edges thanks to vigorous wear the previous year. It's a good way to refresh your wardrobe without spending a lot of cash. I might also clean out the car. It's a mess of google maps and Jane Austen books on tape, not really fit to take anyone but myself anywhere. So, what're you doing with your weekend?
April 10th, 200912:16 pm: Jeans and a t-shirt?
They gave us Good Friday off from work. And I've decided to spend mine sitting in, you guessed it, a coffee shop. And I'm, you guessed it again, still working on sites. But this time, these are my own projects. Increasingly, I'm having trouble with clothes. I've been replacing worn out articles with things that are appropriate work wear, but this also means my weekend wear isn't getting replaced. I'm down to a flimsy skirt and a pair of jeans. I can't help but think back to my mom, back when she was a systems analyst. She wore pretty suits all week long. What did she wear on the weekends? I don't remember! Mom, what did you wear on weekends? How did you balance your clothes? I think I'll have to go to a Goodwill for some weekend clothes soon. Although it may be hard to find work-gear at Goodwill, for separates, it's much better than buying new. A lot of people think "cheap" when they think of buying previously worn clothes, and while the prices are much lower, I feel the savings run much deeper. ( Behind this cut is a lot of environmental, tree hugging rambling wherein I value the lives of toads more than that of my neighbors and encourage you to volunteer your time to putting up fences in pastures. )Bonus points for visiting this site: http://www.storyofstuff.com/ I'm out of steam on this entry now, and I've really wandered all over the place. I must really love frogs.
April 7th, 200909:04 pm: Makeup Bullshit: I have a new favorite blog
You probably know by now that I'm a huge fan of Paula Begoun, aka "The Cosmetics Cop," for her analytical and scientific approach to cosmetics and skin care and their respective industries. Now, when I say she has a "scientific approach," I don't mean she talks about how "oxygen is good for the skin!" or how "mineral makeup is good for you because it's all natural!" Bull shite. I love her because calls things as they are. She doesn't write stuff up like, "Oh, wow! I tried this eye cream and it totally got rid of my wrinkles! For sure you should spend $48 on it if you are worth anything!" She's more likely to shake a disapproving finger at said cream and denounce it as glorified cold cream. She frequently points out flaws and highlights in products from all price ranges, and offers up heaping doses of scientific FACT to boot. Did you know that while vitamin C is good for skin, it is broken down so rapidly by light and oxygen that anything claiming to be fortified by vitamin C should come in a squeeze tube rather than a jar, as the increased surface area the jar exposes will ruin any vitamins you would benefit from very quickly. You can check out more of her articles and subscribe to her (very insightful) newsletter at her site, paulabegoun.com. Here are some of her new blog's posts that I applaud her and her crew for:Mineral Makeup B.S. Even My Mother Needs Reassurance Sometimes
April 6th, 200910:37 pm: Rubifruit may have to close.
Edit (or, before you use the word "bandwidth")I've said this before, but the bandwidth is not a problem. It's the RAM usage and resources that cost money. Every time we display a banner hosted via Rubifruit, our server has to make a calculation. That calculation takes up processing power, usually in the form of RAM. Bandwidth is how much information you can transfer from the host across the Internet, like images, files, etc. But in this case we're talking about core processes that happen before the images ever even hit your screen, before they leave the server. And RAM isn't cheap. Most personal sites won't have to use much of it, but a calculation-heavy site like Rubifruit gobbles it up in order to serve your banners. So don't even mention bandwidth in your reply, or you will make me very sad and grumpy. Your reply will be of no help and will only give the impression that Rubifruit is receiving sound advice and support, which she is not. I appreciate your effort and understand that you wish to help, though. End edit. Rubifruit is using so much RAM on its server from hosting and processing all them impressions and clicks that I'm allocating something like 600 megabytes of RAM to it on the server and it is still popping out a 503 error. That costs me $60 every month. I'd love to bump it up to a number that will stop the errors, but I can't afford it. Yesterday I released the pay-for-clicks system I proposed, but so far no one is using it. I don't know what to do. It's such a good exchange and so many people have benefited from it. But I just can't afford it these days. If I can't find a less expensive host by the end of the month, I'll have to seriously consider letting it go. BUT I DON'T WANT TO!
March 21st, 200909:37 pm: Progress
It's been an interesting week. After being sick and working late for the past one or two, this week was sunny, pretty and the workload was light and sweet. However, a lot of that lightweight workload is entirely due to my putting in extra time over the past few weeks to ensure I'd have reusable scaffolding to work on. It paid off! The tickets kept leaving my queue within hours of landing there. Makes me feel good about the work I do, purr. I had to get brackets glued back on. I popped two trying to eat bacon last week. I know, what was I thinking? But I was in a bad place. The sad part is that my teeth feel all tight again! I have this feeling I can only describe as itchy gums where I want to clench and rub my teeth against each other to relieve it. Joe found a quick cure: swishing bourbon around inside your mouth. It is really good at numbing the discomfort! I guess I'm lucky that I'm old enough to be able to use hard liquor to ease my discomfort. The ortho also told me that, no, a waterpik is not a substitute for flossing, grr. I've found that lime and strawberry fruit pops and beer make great snacks. Funny, but until now, I was never much for drinking. Now I really enjoy a cold hefe after work when my tummy is rumbling. Combine these treats with playing Twilight Princess, and I've started to notice the poky braces less! Bikini WoesSummer is coming, and I want to go swimming, but I have a problem. My boobs won't fit into my old suit. Remember, the one with the boyshorts and the halter top that I loooove so much? Not going to happen unless I'm cool with losing control of the girls during a dive. So I need to consider a new suit, one meant for girls with large chests and works with my long torso and covers my rampant undergrowth, so to speak. My first thoughts were these, from my favorite American-made Pinup Girl Clothing: http://www.pinupgirlclothing.com/skirted-swimsuit-retro-swimsuit.html (they have a version in leopard, but I always felt that animal prints look a bit tarty, but that's just how I was raised) http://www.pinupgirlclothing.com/cherry-swimsuit-retro-one-piece.htmlI like them both. (Which do YOU like?) And in spite of their high price tags, I know PGC makes high quality pieces that fit the moment you put them on. However, one piece suits are notorious for crawling up your crotch if you're long in the torso. So that leaves us with bikinis as options (and I'm not a fan of tankinis, fyi) Heres are some nice tops that WILL fit me down to my cup size: http://www.figleaves.com/us/product.asp?product_id=PM-1122&mci=&size=36ddd/e&colour=&image=r555616-p555864-front (Comes in a turquoise option and is very affordable!) http://www.figleaves.com/us/product.asp?product_id=FBF-9660&mci=&size=36ddd/e&colour=&image=r361631-p361660-style (This is from Freya, and I already know their bras fit me like a glove, so this should, too! Plus, is on sale.) The only problem is that all their matching bottoms are way too revealing, and I have no interest in returning to waxing. I'm way too comfortable like I am. I'm thinking of maybe doing what Leigh suggested once, which is to buy a pair of boy's swim shorts to wear with one of the above mentioned tops. Not sure what to do, but I really want to make use of our complex's pool this spring and summer. It would be good for my body. Any thoughts? Try the one piece? Get the boy shorts? Know an even better solution?? I'm all ears!
March 14th, 200901:17 pm: Braces (with pics!)
Yesterday was Rachel Day, a day off from work. We get our birthdays off, and my boss insisted I take Friday off instead of Monday, for a little three day weekend action. This worked very well for me because I was getting my braces on Thursday, and if they were anything like the spacers, all I would be very whiny and in pain for Friday and absolutely of no comfort to my coworkers. So Friday was Rachel Day, supposed to be filled with gum-numbing cocktails, matinees, clothes shopping (or at least trying them on and taking cute pictures in the dressing room), and art museum visits. But the day did not end up entirely fun-filled. But first, pictures!   Now for a close up...  Aww, see, I'm still cute. Right? RIGHT?!  About $100 worth of stuff I picked up in an effort to keep my braces and teeth squeaky clean:  It's taking about half an hour for me to floss, and it hurts. So I bought a Waterpik (using my cash, not the charity's). I also picked up some plaque dye and small tooth brushes. I really wanted to find a small, soft-bristled, portable toothbrush set, but I could not find one that had soft bristles while I was out. I'll have to jerry rig my own. What it feels likeIt's like my mouth is suddenly full of nails. I can't even purse my lips anymore. I'm having to relearn everything, talking, eating, cleaning, smiling. The pain is not as bad as I was fearing it would be. The spacers were definitely worse than this. And the nice thing is, because these are Damon braces, I don't have to see the orthodontist again until May. I'm told Damons work faster, better, and less painfully than normal braces, and for that I am glad that my ortho could recommend them for my case. One of the worst parts is the chapping. My lips chap like crazy now because I don't lick them or purse them, and they are pushed out, a little more exposed than normal. I also can't apply "hard" chapsticks anymore because the pressure of applying them hurts. The only one that has really worked so far is my one stick of Badger Balm, but Burt's Bees and Chapstick have both fallen short. I am trying some lanolin-based Blistex, but it's a bit runny and has unneeded SPF (which is useles because it contains no oxides or avebenzone to protect against the majority of UVA rays). I could not find any Badger Balm, not even at the Hippy Mart (and I say that lovingly) yesterday. Le sigh. Eating has become dull. I won't be able to eat my favorite foods for two years. No thin mints, white cheddar popcorn, or flattened dried bananas. It's killer. I still have some thin mints in need of a good home... This was part of the reason that the Rachel Day matinee was cancelled. What fun is a movie without popcorn? What will I nosh in the theatre? Everything they sell at the concession stand is verboten! Not to mention, they were showing only the Watchmen and Che Part 1, neither of which sparked any interest in me. ( So onward with the story of Rachel Day! )</div> Tags: teeth
March 13th, 200908:20 pm: Rachel Day
Today was Rachel Day. I am currently reporting via my DS from Open Eye cafe after realizing that the buses stopped early tonight because it's spring break. Alas, information that would have benefitted me prior to buying groceries. I tried on clothes, ate lackluster frozen yogurt, and purchased a water pick and other toothy paraphenalia. Yes, the braces are on!
March 11th, 200911:04 pm: Teeth Update: New Surgeon and why I REALLY have a cross bite.
I have a new surgeon. The old one's office was so slow to return calls that I went back to my ortho and requested to be hooked up with another surgery. And lo, I got to see my new surgeon today. And what fun we had! (This is slightly sarcastic because I was sick with a massive headache the entire time.) She took 3D x-rays of my lower face and made a computer model of them. Imagine an MRI, but of bones instead of soft tissue. She was able to show me cross sections of my jaw and face. "I have a big chin," I said. "No, you have a long chin. You're six feet tall. It's supposed to be that way. It's proportional," she corrected wisely. And then we had a look at my jaw joints. On the right was a happy, nicely shaped, rounded joint that fit properly into its socket. But on the left was pure misshapen ickiness, the joint looked more like a blade than a round ball. She said that all my deviations seem to point to trauma during my bone's growth, with a high probability that my fall on the stairs when I was fourteen damaged the bone, causing it to slow down growing on one side while the other side kept going. The rest of my face began to compensate, and here we are today. We reconvene in three weeks, during which time she's going to make a model of my face that will show what the surgery will change and entail. The nice part is that I will come back with loads of pictures to show you guys! The thing that struck me the most during this visit was how much some of this stuff has become every-day to me. Apparently, I can't open my jaw as wide as I should, something I wasn't even aware of. And I'd almost forgotten that when I try to eat granola or carrot sticks my beaten up joint just pops right out. Why was this fading from memory? Simply because I have given up on eating them. The good news is that the surgery won't hurt nearly as much as removing my wisdom teeth did, thankfully. Sometimes my jaw hurts just as much as though I'd had them removed, so I can only look forward to this discomfort. Payment. If the insurance company doesn't cover this, I have to pay cash up front for the entire thing. That's right. All of it. Out of pocket. Right before I get the surgery. The braces go on tomorrow. Last I checked, we have enough to cover the braces plus $3,000 left over. I've also got $2500 of tax-free flex spending that taking out of my paychecks for the next year (I'd take out more if they'd let me). That's only $5.5k against a $10-25k operation with hospital stay. Let's hope that insurance covers it. Tomorrow is the point of no return! Wish me luck, guys! Tags: teeth
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